The Mummy Returns
Five Stars (out of five)
2001. Released by Universal Home Video. Running time 130 minutes. Rated PG-13. Equipped with closed captions. Has many "making of" features, deleted scenes, a commentary, and much more.

Why am I reminded of Titanic just now? When The Mummy Returns, it's 1933, and Rick and Evy are happily married with a young son named Alex. They're poking around the ruins of an old Egyptian temple site that contains the Bracelet Of Anubis, which was worn by The Scorpion King, whose pact with that dark Egyptian god nearly enabled him to conquer all of ancient Egypt. During a tumultuous encounter with tomb raiders, the O'Connell family finds the Bracelet Of Anubis and barely manages to get it out of the temple with their lives. Meanwhile, a new squad of bad guys, led by the reincarnated Anck-su-namum, dig up the corpse of Imhotep from the destroyed City Of The Dead.

You hear that? I thought I heard Tarzan's yell! It turns out that 1933 is the year of the Scorpion in the Ancient Egyptian calendar, which is the time that the Scorpion King is destined to return from the great beyond (these ancient Egyptian dudes just won't stay dead, will they?), leading the undead armies of Anubis to conquer the world (apparently Anubis is no longer satisfied with just ruling Egypt anymore). However, Anck and her friends want to revive Imhotep so that he can defeat the Scorpion King in hand to hand combat, and thus assume command of Anubis' legions of the undead, who will blindly follow the winner of such a battle. But they need the Bracelet Of Anubis in order to work all of this magical mojo, and so a group of armed thugs plan a road trip to the O'Connell's home in England.

So you won't get your veggies, you ungrateful little brat?! The Mummy Returns is just as much fun as the original 1999 film. Writer/director Stephen Sommers has his vast story taking off on all cylinders from the very first frame, and the relentless pace never lets up as the O'Connell family finds themselves once more fighting mummies, assassins, The Scorpion King and even little pygmy mummies (my favorite creeps of the film). The revelation that Rick and Evy are reincarnated spirits from ancient Egypt strikes me as being a little lame, but at least this gives us a great excuse to witness a marvelous flashback sequence in old Egypt where Rachel Weisz and Patricia Velasquez battle it out in scant bikinis (which is my favorite scene from the film, and the fact that it contains two gorgeous, skimpily clad actresses has everything to do with it).

C'mon, you little twerp, say it: Mother knows best! In her previous life, Evy was the daughter of the same pharaoh who was killed by Imhotep and his lover Anck-su-anmum. Brendan Frasier and Rachel Weisz return as Rick and Evy O'Connell, while John Hannah reprises his role as Jonathan, Evy's brother. Patricia Velasquez, who briefly played Imhotep's lover Anck-su-namum only in flashback in the first film, shines brightly in The Mummy Returns as she vamps it up in a far larger role as a femme fatale this time out. WWE wrestler The Rock makes his big screen debut during a flashback scene within the first five minutes of The Mummy Returns. His Scorpion King character would be spun off into his own movie. The DVD is jammed packed behind the scenes goodies, including another entertaining audio commentary by Director Sommers. With non-stop action and epic battles involving thousands, The Mummy Returns offers plenty of popcorn-movie fun. --SF

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