Bionic Woman
Two Stars (out of five)
2008 (DVD release). Not Rated. Some action/adventure violence. Widescreen. Running time: Eight episodes. Released by Universal Home Video. Equipped with English subtitles. Extras include a commentary on the pilot episode and several 'making of' shorts that were originally made for TV.

What do I spy with my little bionic eye? When I was a boy, I lost a large part of my hearing to Rheumatic Fever. Growing up deaf in the 1970s was not without its challenges. I had to wear hearing aids since the age of seven (and I still do today), and while I gladly accepted the edge they gave me on the hearing world, they also served as a constant reminder that I was different from the other kids. Another source of irritation for me as a kid was the constant, overwhelming message by the mass media that I was alone, that I was not like everybody else. I had never seen another deaf person in movies or TV shows, unless it was the Helen Keller Story, and--with all due respect to Ms. Keller--that wasn’t quite the same.

Why do I hear 'eye of the tiger' playing in the background?! But then along came the original Bionic Woman. It was basically a spin-off of the Six Million Dollar Man. But the story of Jamie Somers, a woman who received bionic implants after a skydiving accident, touched me like no other character on TV in the 1970s. Because, along with her bionic arm and legs, Jamie also had a bionic ear--which essentially made her just like me. Becoming deaf in her ear, Jamie received a cybernetic replacement which not only restored her hearing, but boosted it whenever she needed it…again, just like me (hearing aids have volume control, which enabled me to turn up, or turn off, the sounds of the world). And, just like that, I suddenly had a hero to cheer for on TV, somebody who was deaf…just like me.

Honey, if I can survive the Eddie Olmos glare, then I can handle you! And so when the Bionic Woman was revived for today’s TV audience, I was very eager to see it. Not only was this a favorite childhood series of mine that was returning, but the new version was being executive-produced by David Eick, one half of the team (Ronald D. Moore being the other) who successfully revived Battlestar Galactica, and that fact alone gave me hope enough that this revived version of BW might be even better than the original, which had more than its share of hokey moments (the bionic dog, anybody?). The role of Jaime Sommers had been taken over by the engaging young British actress Michelle Ryan, who’s very capable--yet the series itself is sadly lacking.

Funny, they don't look like Cylons. But, what the hell.... The first episode, which shows how Jaime becomes the bionic woman, feels very rushed--as if this were a longer story that had been cut down for time. And Jaime herself feels very out of place working within the counter-intelligence agency that’s run by the always-good Miguel Ferrier. Jaime’s a bartender who’s been saddled with an annoying little sister, and scenes of Jaime making sure her kid sister has a babysitter before she rushes off to save the world soon became very irritating to watch. The series gives her a villain in the form of Sarah Corvus, well-played by Katee Sackoff (better known as Starbuck, from the new BSG). But, other than a rooftop battle with Jaime in the pilot, the series’ powers that be appear reluctant to let the Corvus character really cut loose, and the result is that Sarah Corvus is vastly underused.

I love Blade Runner. But that doesn't mean I want to reenact scenes from it! The same can be said for the series as a whole. The concept of revitalizing the Bionic Woman for the 21st century is a good one, yet the viewer gets the feeling that it hasn’t been utilized very effectively here. There’s too much hand-wringing over Jaime’s personal life, which isn’t very interesting--while some issues that I find to be more fascinating (such as the fact that Jaime’s boss can spy on her 24/7 through her own bionic eye and ear) are glossed over. And the character of Jaime, as presented here, is pretty bland; especially when she’s compared to the far more dynamic Sarah Corvus, poor Jaime appears to be floundering in a situation where she’s in way over her head.

You hate Jekyll? Just bring it, bitch! Unfortunately, only eight episodes of the series were able to air before the winter 2007/2008 writers strike caused them to shut down production. And that’s all we have collected here in this two-disc DVD box set. The special features are slim--other than a commentary, there’s just the network-produced publicity segments that originally aired on NBC. The box set is optimistically subtitled "Volume One," as if the creators were hoping to come back and complete the first season (and who can blame them?), but prospects for that happening don’t look good at this moment. And so we’re stuck with this imperfect version of The Bionic Woman that never really gets off the ground. Hopefully, they will release the original series on DVD soon. --SF

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